Booze

 

Slap the bag, and it might become your pillow.

Booze is up to you.

6-10 beers/person/day

Seems like a lot, but you would be surprised how much light beer you can drink without even getting a buzz.

• If you bring a bunch of dark beer, you aren't going to be happy. Some is good, a lot is bad. 
• No Glass beer bottles. I bring glass hard liquor, but it is best to put it in stainless container.
• lemons, lime, redbull.
• Bag wine. Slap that shit.
• Remember your mug.
• If you swim, you drink a beer out of a booty.

Everybody will be responsible for providing one Delicious cocktail for the entire group. This means that if it is your cocktail day, you make 16 amazing cocktails in the early evening. Presentation is key. The devil is in the details.

 Here are some examples:

• Mojitos
• G&T
• Margaritas
• Tequila Sunrise
• Whiskey Redbull
• Fine Malt scotch
• Brass Monkey, or better yet, The White Trash Monkey

• The "Anus Burner" Tequila Shot Recipe

  Your Sure To Feel This Shot The Next Morning

  Any drink names with anus in it are bound to taste like one... Just saying...
  
  1 Part Tequila
  1 Slice of Jalapeño Pepper
  Dash of Hot Sauce
  
  Place the slice of jalapeño pepper in a shot glass.
  Add Tequila.
  Add hot sauce until the shot is a deep red color.
  Take shot and try not to die.

  Brain Hemorrhage Cocktail Recipe

  A Not So Funny Alcoholic Drink Or Cocktail Name...

  But definitely a funny looking cocktail. I am not sure I could drink it!
  
  1 Part Peach Schnapps
  Splash of Irish Cream
  Dash of Grenadine
  
  Pour a shot glass 3/4 full of Peach Schnapps.
  Pour Irish Cream into the center of the Schnapps allowing it to clump.
  Drop the grenadine over the back of a bar spoon into Irish Cream.

  
  
  
  You get the point.
  
  
   

Packing list

 

Stuff

On your head

A hat is a necessity. A ball cap or visor would work, but a wide-brimmed hat is ideal to protect from the sun.
Having a way to attach the hat to your person, like using a carabiner to clip it to your PFD or shirt, will keep the guide from having to turn the boat around and fish for your hat if it’s been blown off by the wind or ripped off in a rapid.
At least one pair of sunglasses, preferably from the 80s, a backup pair from the early 90s, and a way to keep them on your head. 
A bandana can be worn either on your head beneath your hat or around your neck. It’s good for dunking in the river to cool off, and it’s also good for cleaning your sunglasses. And it provides another layer of sun protection. the ones with flames are especially cool.

On your body

Long-sleeve, quick dry or very lightweight cotton shirts. Go to the thrift store and buy some rad long sleeve shirts. I really like the ones with turquoise Indian designs.   The sun can be vicious, and keeping covered up is the best way to prevent sunburn. For those who don’t want sleeves, any quick dry t-shirt or tank will do. But make sure to avoid heavy cotton t-shirts since they will just keep you cold once they get wet, and packing up a damp t-shirt into a dry bag for the day will guarantee all your stuff will have a musty smell next time you open the bag.
Pack pants, shorts, or zip-off pants hahahaha zip-offs are really sexy, ideally in a light color for the heat.
Rain gear, a jacket and rain pants. The best is the cheap rubber ones that cover your whole body and make smell like the water out of your garden hose.

On your hands

Blisters and friendship bracelets

 

Redwall Cavern. John Wesley Powell thought the cave could hold 50,000 people. Perhaps closer to 1,000.

On your feet

A good pair of river sandals with a backstrap like Chacos or Tevas. Don’t buy them new the day before. Break them in before you leave so you can prevent blisters.
A nice camp shoe is ever-so-attractive crocs.
I wear flip-flops everyday, but a lot of people like closed-toe sandals, its easy to kick a rock and start bleeding.
A pair of hiking shoes or running shoes with good traction for side hikes particularly if you’re planning on taking a longer trip that allows for more on-foot exploration.

Sleeping

Paco pads and summer sleeping bags, maybe a sheet if its hot, and a pillow. If you don't have a paco pad, bring your inflatable sleeping pad, and assume that it will get lots of holes in it.
Some people like tents, and sleep in them every night while in the canyon. I have never slept in a tent, often I can't even find my sleeping pad, but I do bring a tarp or a rain fly as to shed rain drops.

Toiletries and bathing

Sunscreen and lotion. It is hot and dry down in the canyon. To get burnt on day one and having to suffer through the rest of the trip with lobster red skin can be torturous, and comical. Bring a full size bottle of sunscreen, and chapstick with sunscreen in it. Expect your skin to crack, bring tiger balm or something strong like that.

I’ve heard the story of what happens to those who get extremely dehydrated (it involved a turkey baster, Gatorade, and an opening that wasn’t the mouth) so keep your water bottle with you all the time.

Any medication that you need to live, that seems obvious. What might not be as obvious is to have some in two places. Just in case a bag gets washed overboard or a raven takes off with your toiletry kit (ravens are tricky!), you won’t have to cut your trip short.
In some places, you’re 24-48 hours from a hospital or medical facility.
You will shower/bathe in the river and must use biodegradable toiletries. Just bring a bottle of Dr. Bronner's, and make sure you read the entire label. A quick-dry towel is nice.
If you wear contacts or are prone to dry eyes, make sure to have eye drops. The wind can pick up quickly, I'm not sure what it'll pick up, but it will surely end up in your eye.

Electronics

A camera, extra batteries. You don’t want to go on this “trip of a lifetime(dbl entendre)” and have your camera die on you. Waterproof cameras for rapid shots are expensive, and there are cheaper disposable options available, I personally leave my camera in ziplock bag, but my pictures dont come out all that well. Even waterproof cameras are not likely to be sand proof so be careful when camping and storing your camera overnight since the fine grains of river silt can ruin a camera.
A headlamp, and extra batteries. Once night falls, it gets dark quick. Make sure it’s out of your bag well before you need to make a midnight bathroom run.

Cash and ID

Bring along cash so that you can buy a snicker's bar and a cheesy t-shirt at phantom ranch, and for some snacks on the shuttle back.
Have a photo ID.
Have a photo ID. 
Have a photo ID. 
Have a photo ID.

Drinks

.Bring a water bottle or Camelbak that you can easily bring with you. It should have a strap or a clip so it can be secured to your person on hikes and to the boat while on the river. Hydration is key. I’ve heard the story of what happens to those who get extremely dehydrated (it involved a turkey baster, Gatorade, and an opening that wasn’t the mouth), or the hook. I've even heard of people inserting bananas, well never mind, just drink lots of water. something just happened to the font.

There will be an entire post dedicated to alcohol.

Not at all required, but could be nice

 Per National Parks Service rules, the river is in Grand Canyon National Park, all liquid waste goes in the river. This means that life is a touch harder for women than for men, a sarong or skirt, at least can be nice in camp, but nudity is the norm.


Socks. I know that socks with sandals isn’t really all that sexy, but toe-socks are functional and sexy.
A small mirror in your personal bag. tweezers, mustache wax(mandatory), five hr energy, snacks to put in your life vest, ear plugs, personal hand sanitizer, astroglide, a kazoo, I mean really, the list could go on forever.

What you don’t really need

Camp shower. This will cause spite, and make you look weak.

Laptop. don't bring one, or a giant car battery that is charged by solar panels.

Go pro. Nobody will be going pro on this trip. I dont actually care if you bring a Go Pro, but nobody will ever look at the 70,000 photos you took.

Clothing:

• Swimsuits
• Nylon shorts
• T-shirts
• Long sleeve cotton shirt (for sun protection)
• Long cotton pants (if you sunburn easily)
• Sun hat or visor with tie-on
• Sunglasses with strap
• Two-piece rainsuit
• Athletic/jogging shoes or lightweight hiking boots w/socks
• Sarong (for evaporative cooling, changing clothes, etc.)
• Flip flops, Tevas, or strapped sandals

Equipment:

• Sunblock, lip balm w/sunscreen
• Moisturizing hand lotion
• Small towel
• Toothbrush & toothpaste
• Shaving equipment, small mirror
• Kleenex, eye drops
• Soap & shampoo
• Prescription medicine
• Two one-quart water bottles w/tight fitting caps (no pull tops)
• Fanny pack(awesome) for small items you need during the day (also good for hikes)
• Headlamp with extra batteries
• Extra batteries
• Small camp pillow
• Personal cocktail/coffee mug(this will be by your side all day and night.. The bigger the mug, the more booze/coffee you drink.
• Bills bag, of something similar, any big drybag will do, but you are going to want it to be some what quality. The bigger the better, this will store all your clothing, sleeping bag, and your copy of 50 shades of grey.
• personal smaller dry bag/ammo can/pelican case. I prefer my pelican box for all the little things that you will need daily.
• type III or better PFD
• river knife
• two caribiners and some strap, you are going to find that you will want to tie something to something else at some point.
• 2 pairs sunglasses with strap
• A book
• I suggest that everyone brings a copy of the canyon rafting map, mandatory if you are rowing a boat. you will look at it everyday, and it has lots of useful info.There is a waterproof version that will last for years.
• Baby wipes/gold bond, the small joys.
• camp chair that doesn't soak up water, the fold-able kind, and plan on it breaking.
•  costumes, more on this later.
• advil, hangover helper: electrolytes mixed with alka seltzer.

A few pictures to help you visualize everyday iteams, like an awesome bandana.

There will be more to follow.....
comment if you have a good idea 

What to expect.

For those of you whom haven't been down the canyon, here are some pics and info.

Teams of 3-4 rotate cooking and other duties. One team cooks dinner, breakfast, and lunch, while another deals with the groover, fire pit, dishes, ect. Teams responsibilities change daily, and after 4 days there is usually a day off.

Considered by many, the best part of the day. Never will there be a more beautiful movement than in the Canyon. It is often funny when we reach Phantom Ranch and people are excited to use flush toilets, only to return and talk about how much cleaner and nicer it is to use the groover.

 Cleanliness is of the utmost importance in the Canyon, most people wash their hands more times in one day in the Canyon, than a week at home. No one wants to get sick.

Oh, and there is this also. If you flip your boat, or are part of a flip, you have to appease the river gods by consuming a beer via shoe, flip-flop, sandal, anything that your foot has spent a bunch of time in. Mandatory.

 

 

 SUP LAVA

 

Of the 285? miles of the canyon, only 5 of those look anything like this, but they're amazing, fun, and pretty safe, considering the pool-drop nature of the canyon.

More to follow.

 

Canyon of dreams

A forum to discuss our sept28-oct18 Grand Canyon experience. Or a place for some bad poetry, oh noetry. I will be going over some of the logistics, answering questions, and avoiding mass emails that clog the veins of the world wild webs.

Ok, lets get started, in the wise words of Peter Dinnel, "start slow and taper off."

 21 days in one of the most amazing places in the world, with possibly the coolest people in the world, what more could one ask for.

For those of you that don't know me, I am a 31 year-old Taurus, born and bred on the Western Slope of Colorado. I like to ride bikes, and I encourage all men to wear mustaches. Good, more on that later.
 This will be my third Canyon trip. I spent most of my twenties on rivers of the world, and I feel mostly qualified to lead a group of people into the depths of the grandest of canyons.

We will be arriving at Lees Ferry by Noon on the 27th of September, where Canyon Reo will be meeting us with an 18' raft and 21 days worth of food. We will spend the remainder of that day rigging and re rigging boats. Once we are satisfied with our vessels, we will float them 1/4 mile down stream to our camp for the night, where we will sleep and wait for the park ranger in the morning. After we have established camp, we will all pile into a van or two and drive to Vermillion Cliffs for dinner and beers (we don't want to cook the first night).

Upon waking around 7:30-8 the morning of the 28th, we will have a quick breakfast, coffee and go through the rundown with the park ranger. This is the time that everyone will show their proper ID, drivers license/passport ect. If you don't bring this, you don't float. BRING VALID IDENTIFICATION.

Then we float.

I will post often, maybe daily to make sure that I cover everything. Feel free to comment or ask question about any of my posts, especially if you have a better idea, concern, or some freestyle poetry.

Next posts will involve:
Packing list
safety/hygiene
food
beer/wine/cocktails/drugas
games
music
budget
costumes
travel/shuttle

I'm excited.
kyle